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Monday, May 10th, 2010 | Author:

April 23, 2009. Match #10 of IPL 2009 – Kolkata Knight Riders vs Rajasthan Royals. Tie. Who will bowl the Super Over? Warne goes ahead and gives the ball to Kamran Khan, a fast bowler with no international cricket experience. As young Kamran bowled, I started identifying with him. And, I realized that Priya has been like Shane Warne to the Content Team.

Shane Warne is the greatest cricketer I have ever watched. This respect stems from the faith he shows in his team and his team mates show in him, thereby delivering excellent performance as a team. Over two years, I have seen writers showing the same kind of faith in Priya. We believe that we, as writers, and our articles are in safe hands.

Both Warne and Priya are masters of difficult arts. Spin bowling and financial content are not something that anybody can execute with perfection. They know about the pitch so well, that it shows in the accuracy of what they deliver. They are incredible in what they do. While one has the ability to turn the ball more than the wicket allows, the other has the rare quality of knowing more than what clients actually tell.

It is said that Warne invented a style of bowling – something that was his original style. Of what I have learned about content writing from Priya, if we just spin the content, adding our own understanding to it can take content to the level of originality. The best example, of course, is her extraordinary article on fixed income bonds, which she linked to James Bond movies.

I belong to a generation that has grown up watching Shane Warne. Unfortunately, the next generation will not see much of Warnie’s magic tricks on the field. Similarly, at Veda, I belong to the generation of writers who have grown in Priya’s custody. People like Ranjit and I believe that the next generation of writers won’t be as lucky as us, since Priya will become less and less available for training and answering queries.

Here’s hoping that their journey towards perfection continues and they keep spreading what they have gained, while learning the ultimate lesson of sharing.

Category: Articles  | 4 Comments
Monday, May 10th, 2010 | Author:

NEWS : Now Entertainment With Special-effects

“The characters in this blog are fictitious and any resemblance to persons living or dead is purely coincidental.”

Aliens do not drink cow’s milk but they use it to prepare tea and coffee when they are tired. After traveling from such a long distance to Earth anyone would feel tired. Let’s talk to Hrithik Roshan to ask Jadoo to recommend them a Georgia coffee machine so that our cows are safer.

Please dial MTNL toll free number 1504 to suggest him some ideas to elude cold. I called on this number and told him that it is just because of your height, i suggested him to not to stand tall as air on higher altitude is rare and temperature in substantially low.

Correspondent: Ab aap chhajje se kood chuki hain, aap ko kaisa mehsoos ho raha hai?
Billi: In sawalo ki hata aur pehle ye bata ki dhakka kisne maara tha?
Correspondent: Aap 6 ghante se waha fasi rahi aapko darr nahi laga?
Billi: Ye mere roj ka kaam hai jiska tum logo ne tamasha bana diya.
Correspondent: Kya aap janti hain poora desh aapko Billo Rani bula raha hai?
Billi: Lagta hai ab Bipasha ke pet pe laat padne wali hai 😉 ….
Correspondent: Ye thi hamari apni Billo Rani jo 6ghante tak chhajje me fase rehne ke baad kood padee…. 26 January ko inhe bahaduri medal se sammanit kiya jayega. Cameraman Vinod ke sath mai Deepak Rangrasia, Akaal Tak.

Abhi abhi hamare vishwasneeya sutron se pata chala hai ki Commissioner sahab bhi  kutte ke sath lapata ho gaye hain. Unki wife ko abhi abhi Shashtri Nagar police station me jate huye dekha gaya hai:

Wife: I lost my Husband
Inspector: What is his height
Wife: I never noticed
Inspector: Slim or healthy
Wife: Not slim can be healthy
Inspector: Color of eyes
Wife: Never noticed
Inspector: Color of hair
Wife: Changes according to season
Inspector: What was he wearing
Wife: suit/casuals I don’t remember exactly
Inspector: Was somebody with him?
Wife: I think my Labrador dog, Calvin, tied with a golden chain, height 30 inches, healthy, blue eyes, blackish brown hair, his left foot thumb nail is slightly broken, he never barks, wearing a golden belt studded with blue balls, he likes non veg food, we eat together, we jog together…. And the Wife started crying…..
Inspector: Let’s search for the dog first!!!!!!!

Himesh is scared now. He has started wearing Burkha so that aliens do not see him. Aliens now singing: jhalak dikhlaja – jhalak dikhlaja, ek baar aaja aaja aaja aaja aaaajaaa

Correspondent: You named your dogs ‘James’ and ‘Bond’ and you call yourself ‘Marathi hridaysamrat’.
Khaj Thakrey: Tula maiti kaye….?  Maajhe kutreya che nav ‘Bondhisatva’ aani ‘Jamitra’ aahe. (What do you know? My dogs’ names are ‘Bondhisatva’ and ‘Jamitra’).
Correspondent: Aapne apne kutto ko marathi naam diye hain… kya ye marathi manooooooooooooos ka apmaan nahi hai?
Khaj Thakrey: Me tula phodun takel, me tula kapun takel….. ki paaije tula…. (I will crush you….. I will cut you….. What do you want?)
JAI MARATHI MANOOOOOOOOS……… JAI MAHARASHTRA…..
Correspondent (Running): Aur ye the Khaj Thakrey jinhone apne kutto ka naam Marathi me rakha hai aur unhe angreji me bulate hain…… Bhagte huye Cameraman Sharad Talwar ke sath mai Rajeev Thukla bhagunga Ghar Tak.

Correspondent: Takhi ji kya wajah thi jo aapne Abhishek ko thappad laga diya?
Takhi: Sir, kya batau sir, hum dono Lonavala gaye the sir ghoomne ke liye sir aur usme mujhe waha ek Kiss kar diya sir.
Correspondent: Ek kiss ki itni badi saja?
Takhi: Nahi sir maine use bola ki aur kiss karo sir to usne mana kar diya sir isliye mai use thappad laga ke MIKA ke paas aa gayee sir.
Correspondent:
Aur ye thi meri, aapki aur poore desh ki NAARI Takhi Swayamwant, jo Abhishek ko Thappad laga ke MIKA ke paas aa gayee hain ( Nahi Nahi Abhishek Bachpan nahi Abhishek Jabarjasti). Ab dekhne wali baat ye hogi ki agar MIKA inke dance partner rahenge to Stage ka kya hoga?…. Cameraman Elesh Purujanwala ke sath mai Bhajat Karma, Aakhir Kab Tak.

————————————————————————————-

Is this how NEWS should be?
There are several incidences daily which remain uncovered because media people are too busy creating NEWS. I understand that if there is no NEWS then what do they do? Where do they arrange funds from to sustain? But, compromising on the quality of the NEWS just for TRP raises a question in my mind: A cop lying in front of a camera with one of his legs completely detached from his body, seeking for help and the journalist is not ready to help him because the person behind the camera is a journalist first. If they are choosing professionalism over humanity then after being a professional journalist why do they choose entertainment over real NEWS?

This is what you would like to see?
I would rather go and watch Doordarshan at 8.30 to 9.30pm than watching this crap.

Is there anything that can be done?
End of the day it is all about TRP. If we all stop giving importance to this kind of stuff i believe they will move to some real NEWS.

I know and i agree that i know very little about journalism but i surely know that “these channels are not BREAKING NEWS they are MAKING NEWS, i am not sure if they are also FAKING NEWS”.

Monday, May 03rd, 2010 | Author:

Dear Vanadium,

When I first saw you in the nuclear power station my Heart was oxidized by the cathode of your face. The alpha rays of your eyes were deflected by the nucleus of my eyes towards my Heart. Love of my Heart was attracted towards you to form 1-hearto 2-eyeso-Lovate and the electrons of my eyes started rotating very fast.

When i approached you with a catalyst you acted like a moderator and slowed down the speed of my Heart beat. Beaker of my eyes was filled with tears when this reaction occurred.

Tell me, why the burner of your eyes broke the test tube of my Heart?

Even now my Heart is saturated with your love and will remain saturated forever.

I hope you can understand the organic situation of my Heart.

Waiting for the reaction.

Yours,
Uranium (|_|)

Category: Articles, Building The Web  | Tags: , ,  | 22 Comments
Monday, April 26th, 2010 | Author:

If you are suffering from a midlife crisis visit Rishikesh, I don’t say this infact the Lonely Planet declares. My midlife is far and crisis hasn’t arrived as of now, touch wood. By the way, it was a tough choice between choosing an office outing that happened after a long time and the other place in subject. Cherry and I had zeroed in the time and spot long time back. Going by the plan, we’d be pushing one day early to the promised destination.

Googling in Office

Not sure about where to stay, I did some google search. A tip free for travelers hunting an affordable stay. Step one – Type in your destination’s name, hotel and currency you are comfortable with like for instance ¥, Rs, $, ₤ etc. Your search becomes easier after this exercise. Yes, I spoke to the manager who also happens to be a Bengali, got me a place where I intended to stay, a Ganga facing “view”. Cherry was naturally more excited than me. We had 2 nights and 2 days in hand. Step two – remember, always do some research about any place you visit. Things like local fooding, culture, weather and things to do and other things. Plan your outing and think like a tour operator. You should have a flow chart ready.

Bus Adda

We moved as per the plan and boarded out bus as per the plan from Kashmere gate at 3 PM. The journey was shaky but the excitement was palpable. We reached Rishikesh only after 11 PM. Pretty late and we were wondering if the hotel was shut for us. There were cops for obvious reasons. To my surprise the manager was awake and waiting. After completing registration formalities we were guided to our Ganga ‘facing’ room. I was dead tired and very soon crashed on my bed.
midlife crisis,Ganga,Rishikesh,Uttarakhand,Neelkantha,trek,foreigners,German Bakery,Laxman Jhoola,nirvana,Lucky Hotel,Beatles

Day One

The morning next day was refreshing and the first cup of cardamom tea was very soothing. A fresh wisp of air was constantly beating my face. Smell of incense sticks, sounds of mandir bells together was making the moment more heavenly. Rishikesh is a peaceful place with lot less noise made by piligrims. Atleast much less than its cousin Haridwar. Can you believe it the CM of Uttarakhand intends to run for a nobel prize for organizing a record shattering Kumbh mela this year? At least I know what does it takes when you submit yourself to the state transport department for traveling purposes during this time of the year.

Anyways, I decided to make a move to Neelkantha. We were lucky to get a jeep in this off season. The journey to Neelkantha was equally fascinating. The serpentine route and my trekker (the jeep) were racing against the young and furious Ganges coming from badri almost moving parallel. Phenomenal.

While returning back, we decided to offload ourself from that jeep and take a 12 kilometer trek back to Rishikesh town. Now, that was a sort of an adventure. We saw things like the purple coloured butterfly, that rare small bird, tasteless wild berries, the unnamed brook (which quenched my thirst), the friendly tea shack wala and the breeze. midlife crisis,Ganga,Rishikesh,Uttarakhand,Neelkantha,trek,foreigners,German Bakery,Laxman Jhoola,nirvana,Lucky Hotel,BeatlesAnother highlight of that small trek was that the road was much less traveled and that proved good for us, no unwanted glances or stares. We were given friendly smiles from absolute strangers, mostly foreigners and that little girl- Lata.

We somehow managed to come back to our hotel. Nonetheless, our legs were aching and stomach empty. We had a hearty lunch from a Vaishnav bhojanalya. It was 5 PM by now and we decided to spend the evening near the ghat. Rishikesh is replete with its temples and innumerous ghats making it a peaceful and spiritual place of interest.

Day Two

I and Cherry Window shopped and she wanted the pick of the day one ‘Afghani pyjama’. According to her it’s the “in” thing. We straddled between the shops checked out the pearls and metal jewellery. I was looking for fancy bags and artifacts. You will find a lot of junk lined on the streets. I sometimes wonder what pulls a lot of Israeli tourists here in Rishikesh? Anyways, out of question and my imagination.

In the evening I prefer hanging out in ‘Devraj German Bakery’, apart from the best view of ‘Laxman Jhoola’ they have an exiting menu on the platter spicy grilled vegetable pasta, potatoe cakes, salad, apple struddle (never tried and don’t know what that means), . cinnamon roll, Italian pizza, croissants, German brown bread with peanut butter, hold on you can have Yak cheese for Rs 30 and most of the dishes I have mentioned are hand picked whatever I could remember from an eight paged menu chart. Much to choose from here. I had this opportunity to have one of the best French onion soups ever @Rs25. What else? The evening was spent near the Parmarth Ashram. The arti along the ghats are magical and surely transcends you to a different world. The night dropped and thought crept slowly. We had to leave tomorrow. Sad but worth it – our trip that was. It was Holi-the festival of colours. Some people were having fun along the bonfire near the ghat, till late night.

Day Three

The next day morning, the manager asked us if we liked their services, I agreed with him
and also told him that I’d recommend my friends who would plan a visit to Rishikesh.
There is a lot more than I can mention in this piece to do in Rishikesh. The stays was relaxing and believe me, you’ll come out a different person from Rishikesh.midlife crisis,Ganga,Rishikesh,Uttarakhand,Neelkantha,trek,foreigners,German Bakery,Laxman Jhoola,nirvana,Lucky Hotel,Beatles

I was surprised to see how locals as well as our foreign guests were playing holi without any inhibitions. They mingled with each other freely. midlife crisis,Ganga,Rishikesh,Uttarakhand,Neelkantha,trek,foreigners,German Bakery,Laxman Jhoola,nirvana,Lucky Hotel,Beatles

It feels good. Rishikesh has definitely changed since the Beatles arrived and it’s not the hippie and yoga happy yappie destination anymore. It’s more than what you think, not just spiritual but developing a premier adventure sport destination count in the river rafting and bungee jumping. Laying my eyes on the river ganges and the untold changes I undergo is something that pulls me again and again to this mystical place. Inspite of sights like the hungry cow or the snappy monkey or for that matter every make-you-believe ‘guide’ appears to be a yoga expert and guarantees you how to attain nirvana, Rishikesh will remain close to me and I will keep coming time to time, irrespective of any time and space I am in.

Sunday, April 18th, 2010 | Author:

More than 25 dead Olive Ridley turtles were sighted near Prayagi and Arjipalli this week. One of the main reasons for their untimely deaths has been attributed to an oil spill from a ship near Gopalpur port, Orissa. Over seven thousand litres of commercial oil had spilt from the MV Malabika an Essar-owned vessel on Tuesday evening. Worse, that there has been no official word of the vessel owners.
To begin with, the Olive Ridley’s are one of rarest species and are endangered ones and also listed in the US Endangered Species Act.

An Olive Ridley turtle near Orissa
An Olive Ridley turtle near Orissa

We are fortunate that in India, we have an opportunity to nurture them. According to trusted sources over 1,50,000 Olive Turtles were either killed in the last one decade. These poor creatures are either killed for their meat, skin or their shell. All of us, should take responsibilities of our actions. The organization in question is the entity owning that vessel. If the reported incident and the people responsible for the mishap is true then I fear that the consequences are far more frightening. The spill can cause cutaneous toxic reactions and extreme suffocation for the marine turtles. Some marine scientists have also slated that the planktons and smaller sea animals near the beach will be affected through the spill.

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Sunday, April 18th, 2010 | Author:

“Tea is a Cup of Life” – Unknown

Historically serving Tea has always been associated with get together, meetings, parties, house warming sessions and many other social events. Throughout the world people have been drinking tea in innumerous ways and methods, some of them having respective meanings and connotations.

That’s all right but why do I drink tea?

# I want my day to start with a cup of hot tea, why?? I do not know, maybe my body clock needs that beverage.

# I have a cup of tea in the middle of the day as well as night to re-energize my system.

# A cup of tea can be consumed among old and rekindle old memories associated with tea at the same time rekindle new friendship and association with new ones, I have done it

# Nothing beats a cup of tea, when you are traveling in the mountains and stop for a break, I do it.

# In a wintry evening, mid-monsoon or even the evening office snacks – tea and samosa (a stuffed pattie -an original Indian snack,) go pretty well.

A tea stall near Mana with an interesting name
A tea stall near Mana with an interesting name

Reference of tea has been clearly mentioned in Ramayana as Sanjeevani buti, however commercial consumption and distribution of tea expatiated after the British East India company. Going by the history, Tea perhaps was mentioned first in the Gilgamesh epic, during 3000 BC or something. Other important story dates back at around 2737 BC, in China. Shen Nung, the second emperor who also happened to be a creative scientist. Nung had a habit of boiling his drinking water. During this process some tea leaves accidentally fell in his tea pot. The rest is history. Today, tea is the most-popular beverage in the world. India and China are the biggest market for tea.

Photo source: Zastavki.com
Photo source: Zastavki.com

Below are some great tea facts (or tea trivia) to read through while enjoying a cup of tea.

• A cup of black tea has half the amount of caffeine than a cup of coffee.

• Drinking milk may mean stronger bones, but the same goes for a cup of tea!

• In a single day, an experienced tea picker collects around 70 pounds of tea, which is equivalent to create 14000 cups.

• There are four types of tea: white, green, oolong, and black. Interestingly these four types can turn into thousands of varieties depending on the influence of culture and usability.

• Tea plants come from a common plant, Camellia Sinensis.

• If left to grow unchecked this evergreen plant can reach a height of over 30 feet.

• Tea drinking can abate your appetite.

• It takes three to five years for a tea bush to grow and ready for harvesting.

• According to recent studies one cup of tea daily can fulfill over 15% of minimum daily requirement of calcium, 10% of folic acid and almost 45% of manganese.

• Used tea leaves also double their usability as manure and it improves garden soil considerably.

As I have expressed before, a cup of tea is not what it looks like in its physical form. It is my source of adda, my thoughts are laced in that one whole cup.  Well, if you still think what is so special about this drink, worse if you have never tried. Try a cuppa “T “and let me know what do you think after …..that.

Chay ya phir thanda????

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Tuesday, March 30th, 2010 | Author:

As soulful Malayalam songs play on in the background, I’m inspired to write this piece. As a matter of fact, I’ve always been intrigued by the power of music to transform people, however transiently, to calm, soothe and uplift them; whenever, wherever. Great music can transport people into imaginary lands, evoke nostalgia, throw open floodgates of memory, and as the great musician Tansen would have done, lighted fires, brought the rain and cured diseases…

So, what makes the sound of music so magical? Why is great music inspiring every time you listen to them, no matter how often you do? Why does great music always grow on you, rather than you growing tired of it? Well, as I still am clueless about the answers, I thank the Almighty for the great gift of music and His blessed musicians. (Wish writings too had the instant connect and mass reach that music enjoys!).

Speaking of musicians, my long-time favorites are maestros A.R. Rahman, Illayaraja (of “Pa” fame) and the late Malayalam composer Ravindran. For me, their soul’s divinity is reflected in their music, which is an unmistakable connection with God. So, if someone were to ask me what divinity and complete bliss are, I’d, without a grain of doubt, answer: it is in the music that moves, in their golden renderings, in soulful poetry, in nature’s magnanimity and, eventually, in mothers’ care. So, as a parting note and a tribute, I pray to the Almighty to endow His gifted children with more talent, passion, love and humility, which fuel their sublime creativity and enable them to touch lives for ages to come.

Tuesday, March 30th, 2010 | Author:

I received a rosary from a priest last Sunday. Touching a few beads ,I gave them each a name.  I called the first bead, ‘Love’. The bead whispered, ‘Converge Love and Diverge Love’. There is a story of a seeker who wept openly at the mere sight of a hill,a mountain a flower or a river. One day someone asked him  “Why do you cry?”

He replied:” Looking at these icons of nature I hear a voice which says, ‘Do not be thankless! ‘ You have forgotten the creator of the universe. This rattles my soul and so I weep”. That call for the universe is beautiful and we are lucky to be part of it.

Love binds us with silken threads. We get bonded; we get linked with people whom we love. Love unites us. By loving the supreme, you are united with Him, for you will feel God’s presence within you and around you. When you love God, you will learn to love others and your life will be built on the foundation of love.

I called the second bead ‘Humility’. It says: “Give up Pride.” Just as eating food and drinking water are necessary for living, it is necessary to practice humility. One has to pay a price for being egoistic.

How foolish is to say, “I did this, I did that! “This  ‘ego-intoxication’ must -go! For what am ‘I’ but a flickering candle that at the dawn will die!

The third bead is ‘Peace’. It says: “Don’t be angry. Keep you cool.” Anger  is harmful. One mother got angry because her child was troubling her while she was working. She admonished the child, but the child continued to play mischief. The enraged mother  picked up the child and threw him down. Every headless act is sinful but there is much more irrationality in anger.

With love, humility and peaceful disposition, your path can only become more pleasant and less difficult.

Monday, March 29th, 2010 | Author:

We have been noticing a rapid rise in the graph of literacy rate, but it is a fact that corruption, terrorism and crimes have also increased with the same rate or probably higher. It is generally believed that an educated man has more intellectual power and he is ethically better than a layman. But then isn’t it strange that a place having a large number of literate people has equal number of evils too. Yes this is where our modern education fails. Our modern education system has produced a vast population able to read but unable to distinguish what is worth reading.

If we don’t know the value and ethics of life then what’s the use of collecting degrees. You will be surprised to know that most of the criminals, chain-snatchers etc. are highly educated. Another example which i would like to tell you is an incident where four B.tech graduates took away the life of that woman who gave them life and the reason was a mere superstition. They believed that some wicked power was inside their mother’s body. How deplorable it is! Despite having good qualification, they were not literate enough to distinguish between right and wrong. It is definitely the fault of our modern education system that we only get bookish knowledge. As a formality, value education, environmental studies etc. are being included in our syllabus but we all know neither the teachers nor the students take interest in these subjects.

All these statements are sufficient enough to put a big question mark on our modern education and by the way, we are debating this topic itself shows that education is lacking its value in some or the other way. In the end, I just want to repeat the words of Adam Cooper, “You don’t need any highbrows traditions or money to really learn, you just need people with the desire to better themselves.

Monday, March 08th, 2010 | Author:

My friend baba says they go wherever there is public interest. They did it with WW-1, WW-2, Nam 1962/68, 9/11, now Iraq, Afpak is left. Anyways, I wanted to share final results about the Oscars, 2010. There were many first’s this time. War movie “The Hurt Locker” stole the thunder on Sunday by winning six of the film honours which includes the best movie and director. Kathryn Bigelow the director of “The Hurt” happens to be the first woman to win. Icing on the cake? The film also took credits for the best original screenplay, film editing, sound editing and mixing. It was all in the family, ex-family whatever you mean it. Ms Bigelow was at logger head with her ex-husband, James Cameron, whose Avatar was a hot favourite, before the final announcements at the Kodak theatre, LA.

Sandra Bullock gets an Oscar in the best actress category in a lead role for The Blind Side, she plays a motivational lady.

Jeff Bridges is the Best Actor of the world, he wins the Oscar in a leading role for “Crazy Heart”, Jeff plays a laidback country singer, whose life changes somehow after meeting someone.

Actor Christoph Waltz who plays a Nazi officer in Quentin Tarantino film Inglourious Basterds took home the best supporting actor.

African American actress Mo’Nique bagged the best supporting actress for role as an abusive mother for “Precious” based on novel Push, at the 82nd annual Academy Awards, Los Angeles.

Geoffrey Fletcher wins the Best Screenwriter award for film “Precious”

Balloon adventure “Up” of Disney Pixar won the best animated feature.

The Best Original Song for ‘Crazy Heart’ went to Ryan Birgham and T Bone Burnett

Logorama won the Best Short film.

Director Gregg Helvey’s short film “Kavi” lost to the New Tenant in the category of live action short.

Prudence music won the documentary short subject award.

The best make up Oscar award went to Star Trek.

The best costume award was bagged by Sandy Powell for “The Young Victoria”

Avatar finally for its due for outstanding art direction and Rick Carter and Robert Stromberg won the award for Outstanding Art Direction for “Avatar” and  Mauro Fiore won Best Cinematography Award. The sci-fi alien masala also won the Oscar for Best Visual Effects, very true. I always felt Avatar was one of the 1980’s Dharmendra pot boiler, it had everything action, romance, comedy, drama.  Anyways, let us proceed. Micheal Giacchino won the Best Original Score Award for balloon adventure “Up” and the “Cove” won the Oscars in the Best Documentary Feature section.  The best foreign film went to Argentinean film “The Secret in their eyes” The movie is on a retired prosecutor.

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